Anyone's hips grind when they walk? Doesn't sound great does it, quite literally, but my left hip has started to make a grinding noise and is causing a searing pain.
So today I am having a rest day from Muay Thai and will be seeing a physio or a chiropracter and hopefully my internet researched worries of having arthritis is just a misplaced fear.
To be honest I'm not the happiest that I have been in the past ten days or so, but I am not going to let it get me down. A lot of good work has been done personally, both mentally and physically since departing the UK. Part of my reasoning for coming away was to try and flatten out my emotional range of extreme highs to extreme lows. So I shall don my make believe "Harri Krishna" robes this morning, take some deep breaths, think about heavenly butterflys and mystical well being - then deal with this problem as soon as possible rather than let it fester and turn into something that may cause me to spiral downwards - both phsically and mentally - not good would that be!
Now, that's got me thinking.
See, self help books would have you thinking all sorts of things at this point (I haven't read any beyond the introduction of one so I don't know what exactly) and I am guessing they'd have me thinking along the lines of - "The path to enlightenment is a journey of a spiritual kind" or "The inner self is working at all times and will surface when you are in your hour of need" or "You need to focus your energies towards your inner-self".
Personally and rightly so (as I am always right, lol), I find all of that a load of b*llocks. Yes, let me spell that out A LOAD OF B*LLOCKS. Let's be brutally honest, an individual, eg me, can ultimately only sort myself out. And the major problem that I have, don't know about you, is that I probably have problems accepting that I have a problem and then have an even bigger one confronting the problem - mainly because my brain allegedly doesn't know how too or doesn't want too or doesn't like too.
Whether this be the fact that I have liked one too many drinks in the past (And future no doubt - no I am not an alcoholic thankfully/luckily, I just have trouble saying no) which is probably a symptom of a problem or for example, putting things out of my mind that bother me/cause pain/anguish - which is a problem.
However, I think the one word that I need to learn how to put into action is "Confrontation". Especially when dealing with a potential problem. I usually tend to find myself procrastinating; confronting and dealing with it I think is the way forward. This may come across as blindingly obvious to you, but having had a clear head for almost two weeks - for the first time in probably 20 years - it seems to make a bit more sense to me than just trying to lock away the problem in the back of my mind or alternatively, inside the smoke and mirrors of a self help book.
Now this does not mean that I am going to start too write a list of all of my problems as a lot of them have been hidden away very successfully - digging them up and asking them around for a cup of tea and a natter, well, that would just be silly. What I may do though is have a little word with some of the ones that are floating around at the moment. eg is the electricity reading where I am staying really 328 and not say 300 therefore setting me up for a bigger bill upon departure and like I mentioned earlier, have I really got arthritis and do I risk a big medical bill sorting it out - yes of course I bloody well should - one lifetime & one body/mind to get me through it - must look after it!!
So that's my little piece of personal knowledge and learning for the day - Confrontation - it always sounded to me like a very nasty word, one that would cause upset perhaps? But let it be known from this day forwards that "Confrontation is your friend".... yes, it's my new friend!
Right I am off to try and fix my hip, which in turn will prevent any further deterioration to my mind and body, and I'm also going to speak to the adorable Tang on reception about my meter reading - any excuse to say hello to her she is a total honey!
As a very popular Meer Cat would probably say, "Simples".
No comments:
Post a Comment